Thursday, September 16, 2010

humbled

today i'm humbled. the past few days have brought with them a wave of emotions. joy, sorrow, happiness, contentment, excitement, anticipation, heartbreak.... sure- we all have those emotions and feelings. but i feel like this week was an exception to the rule of "normal".  but today i'm humbled. i've felt great joy this week- spending such wonderful time with my mom and dad over the weekend. i've felt immense excitement and anticipation about this coming weekend- friends coming to town for the iowa state v kansas state game and then the exciting hawkeye game... those things gear me up! i've felt contentment- the change in weather brought this feeling...fall calms me, it soothes me and my soul.

heartbreak and sorrow for my father and his family... my aunt luann has brought me feelings of strength...literally on her death bed (as horrible as it sounds- i waited for word that she had passed today) she brought a family together....brothers and sisters, children, estranged cousins and extended family. we all waited...we prayed and sent our thoughts to those in south texas. for me, i felt overwhelming sadness for my amazing father... i wasn't close with my aunt louie- but i can't bear the thought of losing one of my brothers...and for that reason my heart aches for my dad. but tonight...that heartbreak and sorrow and aching heart turned to relief and humility. luann is breathing on her own- without a ventilator. she is certainly not out of the woods and i don't dare get my hopes up...but i'm humbled by her strength and by the will she has....tonight a little bit of peace is in the hearts of the Zobel family. if anything - they all are together.

i'm humbled by life. this precious life we are given so freely. how many days do we take for granted? i know i take several for granted if not 85% of the days i have lived. why is it that tragic events make me stop and think? sure - i like to think i live life to the fullest...but do i? today i'm humbled. i'm grateful.

tonight on my walk with lena i crossed our favorite bridge and stopped. i looked up at the sun....i felt the cool, north breeze on my face...i watched the turning leaves sway and tumble to the green grass...i was humbled.

p.s.- i swear it won't always be a serious blog! but this entry brought tears and peace. thanks for being my audience. oh- and i received a request for a 3 a.m. blog...

1 comment:

  1. tears cleanse the soul ... revive the spirit ... and remind us that it's not the breaths we take ... it's the moments that takes our breath away ... and tomorrow when you cross the bridge and the breeze from the north brushes the hair from your face ... know your momma's thinking of you :) Love you!

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